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OMG A FLASH FROM AIDS?!?

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OMG A FLASH FROM AIDS?!? Empty OMG A FLASH FROM AIDS?!?

Post  Mr Aids Wed Dec 24, 2008 5:33 am

My Christmas present to you is this flash.

Your present to me can be reviewing and criticising this flash.

Comb over it, point out any spelling mistakes and grammar errors, and if you're a zombie fan, mistakes in the knowledge.

By doing this, you get to appear in the credits of the flash. The presents keep on coming. Pick a name for me to credit you as, if you don't like what we already call you.

I rushed through this, so I expect there to be plently of mistakes.

This is not the final version, the fixed up version is what I'll be submitting to NG.

Anyways, here it is.

PS. I just realized the music dosen't loop. I'll fix that in the final version. To listen to the music, click Music On at the bottom.

I'm tired, I'm going to sleep. I've been working on this flash nonstop for 12-15 fucking hours, and about 3 hours the previous day.
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Post  WolflanDarkwolf Wed Dec 24, 2008 6:02 am

I thought it was neat, tidy and imformitive. The text is a tad hard to read though.
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Post  Mavander Wed Dec 24, 2008 6:28 am

The sings of a zombie outbreak.
Point five: "in which" is double

Symptoms, hour 11 - you forgot a coma between numbness and slowed.

The handgun, fifth line "a zombie's". You forgot the '

Supermarkets
Spoiled, not spoilt



I'm only pointing out grammar mistakes, because I know absolutely nothing about virus-made zombies. Necromancy would be something I'm knowledgable about, but, well, appearently, everyone thinks that a virus is more dangerous than ancient and dark magicks used to stop the peaceful rest of the ones who already died and torment their souls in a body that can no longer feel anything. How cruel
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Post  Animetal Wed Dec 24, 2008 10:47 am

I read so many mistakes I forgot them.

Gauge. Zombie's. You forget the 's.

On the Grenades, you wrote throught instead of through. Just after Shrapnel. In the same section, Overated, you wrote Overatted.

You wrote Defence EVERYWHERE. It's DefenSe.

Anyways, on the THE DEFENCE part, you wrote builings, missed the D.

Police stations, you misspelled Unfortunately.

Churches section, There's a sentence that should be "The will, Eventually".

Waiting it out, it's practice, not practise. Heh, you mispelled Psychological. You wrote "Psycholical", and RIGHT AFTER that, Devastating.

On Equipment you wrote Bandanna.

The best mistake on it is Vechiles. LERN2WRITE NEGRO. It's Vehicles. In that sentence, Unforunately and doesn't. A while later, Maneuver.

Other modes of transport, you wrote is instead of if. Then you wrote Bycile.

That's all I have. =D
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Post  Mr Aids Wed Dec 24, 2008 9:53 pm

K, I've fixed everything, I went through it all.

I've credited you all as Wolf, Animetal and Mavander.

Is that ok?
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Post  WolflanDarkwolf Wed Dec 24, 2008 10:07 pm

I'm cool with that.
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Post  Animetal Thu Dec 25, 2008 9:49 am

I prefer Ani the Eater of Wombs. Or the Destroyer or Virginities.
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Post  Mavander Thu Dec 25, 2008 10:33 am

Mine's fine.

And Ani? I think you need an inspiration, you're running out of good ideas. I will NOT help you find that inspiration in any way.
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Post  Animetal Thu Dec 25, 2008 11:31 am

Old School is always Ok.
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Post  Mr Aids Thu Dec 25, 2008 8:16 pm

K it's done.

Final version can be viewed here.
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Post  zmanwarrior Fri Dec 26, 2008 6:03 am

I have that book.

I love that book.

Hence, your flash is awesome.
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Post  Mr Aids Sat Dec 27, 2008 1:28 am

Cheers!
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